Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Ok, this is me

Well I did it. But I have to tell you, as I was uploading the photos of me....no make up, slightly overweight, and just feeling especially frumpy and chunky...I heard the lies screaming in my head. (Photos posted on the right side of this page) "People will say, 'OMGsh, look at how much weight Melissa has gained! She just lost it all last year, what happened to her?' 'Melissa, you really do look thick, just look at Shamu and Namu...no not the whales, your thighs.' 'And there's that beautiful chin zit..do you really think anyone will want you to speak at their event with Mt. Zitsky ever present?' 'Even the make up doesn't cover the face fat. You look like a moon pie with a smile.' 'What a loser. You just can't seem to gain control over this area of your life. And you are ugly.'" I could go on and on, but you get it. I am very self conscience about posting these photos. But I truly believe we have to get serious and be honest with our struggles. I know the thoughts above are not true. I know in my heart that I am beautiful and the scales and my outward appearance don't determine beauty. I know it. I believe it. I am becoming intentional on my thoughts reflecting it. So, I say, "Get out of my head you pirate! You are not going to steal my treasure today!"

This is a journey. A journey takes time. It can be challenging, but it can also be rewarding.

I'll close with one of my favorite verses from the Bible. 1 Samuel 16:7b- "....Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at heart."

Bless Your Heart,


Melissa

8 comments:

Lysa TerKeurst said...

Sweet Melissa,
It wouldn't matter if you have ten Mt. Zitsas on your face... girl you are Beautiful!

Thank you for your honesty and for being vulnerable- you are loved!
Lysa

Amy Carroll said...

You look marvelous! You remember that weird character that Billy Crystal did? Anyway, it's true, and I think we should all say it loudly to each other--often!!

You know that weight is one of my struggles, too. I keep wondering if this time will be the time it stays off. I'm not making anybody any promises!

All I know is that I had a boyfriend in college that kept me very skinny---and miserable. I always tell Barry that I'm so fluffy because he makes me so happy!

Amy

Micca said...

Oh, Melissa. thank you for creating this blog. it's going to bless many starting with me! I, too, struggle with...well, all you've mentioned. I think most women do. I agree to join you in getting healthy and feeling great! It's always easier with a friend. thanks for being mine.
love,
Micca

Denise said...

Well, If ya want my opinion and input ... I have to tell ya to tell those thoughts to "SHUT UP" and get behind ya! So, if you don't say it today, I am saying it on your behalf! Shut up neg. thoughts and drive girl, go get em and make it a God filled Personal Training type of day! I like the workout pics the best anyway.... real and into what God gave ya.... blood sweat and tears of joy!
Love U, D

Dee Langley said...

Melissa!
Oh Girl I am 5'7" and 224 pounds. I was 308 and I am very happy that I have lost the weight but I would be tickled to just be under 200! I know that there are some ladies who see me and would be tickled to be at my weight. If you notice I didn't say I would be happy if. . . Because I am happy now! I love my life, I love that I am healthy, and I love my Lord. My body, well let's just say I am working daily on that love. But I am happy that I can see, I can walk, I can breathe, and I can praise him!!! I played the "I Suck" game better than anyone but I REFUSE to play anymore! Our pastor asked us to give up something about easter of last year and I gave up the "I Suck" game.
I thank you for being honest and vulnerable for all of us because from a "fat girl's" perspective we would think you have it all. Oh to be 150 pounds would be a dream although according to the government that is my ideal weight!
We all have to keep the pirates away from us and CHOOSE not to believe the lies!
Greater is he that is in me than he that is in the world!!!
NO MATTER WHAT WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL!!!! Because we are daughters of the KING!!!

Alexa said...

Princess Melissa,

You've always told me I am a daughter of the King. Man may look at the outward appearance, but God looks at our hearts. Now let's all go out and get some cheescake! (or how about we split a piece).

Thank God he is focused on where it counts. Of course it still matters how we take care of our bodies, but I mean, can it get much better than to be a daughter of the King? Remember what a treasure you are Melissa. Thank you for opening up this discussion.

I love you,
Alexa

Melissa said...

I am so encouraged by the responses and emails that I have gotten today about this blog! It seems it really is something that so many of us relate to and struggle with. Thank you all so much for your comments and encouragement. Please keep checking back and posting your thoughts, feelings, and your journey about feeling beautiful.

IAB,
Melissa

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for being real. I can't believe you did this, I had a very similiar conversation with my husband just today.